My Flesh and My Heart Fail

MY flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. PSALM 73:26

It has been almost four months since Kaycee choked on the bottle cap and was rescued by Officer Ramos. Just a few weeks ago, she turned 1 year old, running around and babbling at her birthday as a true miraculous testimony of God’s provision and strength.

Yes, HIS strength.

Without a doubt we experienced the strength of The Lord that day and in the healing weeks that followed.

But now, after more time has passed, I tend to forget. I tend to forget his healing and miraculous hand in our lives. I tend to forget his amazing provision in our times of need and desperation. I tend to forget his faithfulness.

This past week, all four of my family members have been sick. We returned from our 4th of July holiday with everyone healthy, but just a few short hours later, both girls had fevers and were putting themselves in bed.

The next few days were a whirlwind of sick–fevers, sore throats, vomiting. You know, all the fun stuff. It was all I could do to keep the house clean and my sanity intact.

But then, my husband got sick. And I don’t do well with my husband sick.

Sure, I can give him tylenol and water, make him soup, force him to lay down and get some rest, but… well, he is my other half and without him, I just don’t work very well.

As I laid in bed late Saturday night, the girls asleep, the house a mess, and piles of dishes and laundry engulfing me, I couldn’t help but cry. My heart cried out to God in weakness as I laid next to my husband, him shaking and soaked with sweat from the fever, that I couldn’t fix.

“I CAN’T DO THIS!”

A quiet response.

“You’re right. You can’t. But I can. I always do. And I always will.”

Peace warmed my body as I surrendered to him and was reminded of the very verse that he had given me in one of my darkest times, just days after Kaycee choked.

MY flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. PSALM 73:26

HE is my strength. HE is my portion. He will heal. He will provide. And He will be faithful when I am faithless.

And I whisper a sweet, “Amen.”

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2 thoughts on “My Flesh and My Heart Fail

  1. Wow…I SO SO SO needed this today. I am having such a terrible day at work, and instead of turning to God first, I try to handle it myself. As I sit here on my lunch break and read your words, there are tears in my eyes because you are so right…God is my portion…He is my strength. I should always turn to Him first, instead of to myself. Thank you so much for the reminder, and God bless!! I pray your family gets and stays healthy. Love ya!! xoxo

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