Well Organized! Great Leader! (a.k.a. Fearful Control-Freak)

Perhaps my biggest struggle when it comes to the issue of control is trying to plan every step of the way. I want to know every date, time, detail, and answer. I have an A-Type personality and I am very organized. Not having an answer drives me crazy! In trying to control, I am often filled with worry or fear about the worst case scenarios.

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Perhaps the best example of having to let go of control and organization of every detail is life as a parent. Oh how I struggle as a mother to let go of control of my children’s lives–not that I want to control their lives, but I am always so fearful that something terrible will happen to them. But I have to let go. I need to be conscientious of their safety and my role to protect them, but beyond that, I have to let go and trust that God has a perfect plan and he will see them through. Yes, they might encounter danger and tragedy. Yes, something horrible might happen. But a bigger YES, that God is in control. And no matter how much I try to control, he truly is the one in control. So…I need to stop worrying and fearing and let it go to God. Hmmm…this letting go thing is going to be pretty hard, but I’m ready to try and walk the journey.

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